Life Lesson

Today I heard from a friend that, our friendship was over. I'm sorry to say that this is not the first friendship to end so abruptly. Sad. All I can think is what life lesson will emerge from this friendship? What have I learned? Thinking...

YIKES!

Ugh! I don't know where to start...let me warn any possible readers that this will be some serious verbal diarrhea...I am sitting alone in my classroom and it's hot and sweaty and I am MISERABLE. I feel like I don't want anyone around me...I feel like I am completely alone...it's like a panic attack. Dad's gone. Every one's moving on with life...right now I am FROZEN. If I could run out of this building right now I would. I just want to escape. People are annoying me. Just going about their daily business and I want to SCREAM look at me!!! I Hate this!!! (I'm not sure exactly what this is.) I am disappointed because colleagues are getting new jobs and interviews and I WANT TO LEAVE. This became crystal clear to me today.

I've outgrown this.

Well...eight minutes until the kids are back. Luckily I still like all of them!!!

Breathe...breathe....(just reminding myself)

National Poetry Month

This week we've been writing poetry in class to celebrate National Poetry Month. I teach two classes and all year one of these classes has challenged me every step of the way. Yesterday I taught a lesson to reluctant poetry writers. WOW! They wrote poetry. It was one of those moments....one of those days...

Our Thursdays end with the whole school writing for fifteen minutes of writing. In those fifteen minutes, I wrote a poem inspired by these students. I'll post it tomorrow!

One more day til the weekend...enjoy Friday.

A New Me

OK...it's been such a long time since I've posted here. Life gets so busy. So many people and responsibilities pulling me in every imaginable way. It's only 8:30 am and today I've made a decision. A decision to change my body, my nutrition, and my exercise...for so long I've hidden behind the pounds. It's safer. No one will look at me because of all of the extra padding. Safer. My heart hurts so much from my loss this year, that I needed to protect it. Every day I get stronger and want to be myself again. I'm tired of hiding. My goals include being kind to myself, being patient, moving more, and eating less. One day at a time, I will change my life...

20 Questions

20 questions happens to be my very favorite game.

What is your superpower?

– I have the ability to disappear whenever I choose.

Who are you most like in life?

– I am most like my dad. Outgoing, positive, and hard working! Dad taught me to love life and enjoy every moment.

Do people ever tell you you look like a celebrity?

– I think I have one of those faces that looks familiar. I have been recognized all over the world. One person (long ago) told me I looked like Carrie Fisher. (I don't see it.)

What are your views on weddings?

– NOT for me. I planned a wedding (but canceled before the event). Not worth the money or stress. I want a beach and a sunset, or a quaint chapel in the woods...small, quiet and peaceful!

What was the last book you read?

– I am really into Paulo Coelho.
By the River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept: A Novel of Forgiveness (P.S.)
By the River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept: A Novel of Forgiveness is what I am currently reading. It is phenomenal!

Who is your hero?

– My mom and dad are my heroes. The older I get, the more I appreciate what they did for me and my sister. I feel lucky to have them as my parents!

What are five songs that would be on the soundtrack of your life?

– Anyway by Martina McBride.
– The Impossibles, Joe Nichols.
– Always on Your Side, Sheryl Crow & Sting.
– Strength, Courage, and Wisdom by India.Arie
– Taking Chances by Celine Dion

Have you ever been burned?

– Never badly.

What is your worst habit?

– Fidgeting and being too hard on myself.

What is the best lesson your parents taught you?

–Learn to take care of yourself!

What are three things that hang on your walls?

–I JUST moved...nothing yet. I will have plenty of family pictures.

Who do you think will actually WIN the presidency? Will it be the right choice?

–I believe Obama has a very good chance at winning. He has my vote.

Is your bed made right now?

–No. I'm IN bed right now.

Where would you like to wake up in the morning if you could be anywhere?

– Martha's Vineyard in August.

Do you do anything creative?

– I write.

What would you like to be doing in five years if there were no limits to who you could be?

– Married and pregnant. Working at my own Writing Center. Publishing my writing.

Why Craigslist?

– Why not?

What is really the greatest thing about meeting someone new?

– What it teaches you about the world, yourself, and the possibility it opens.

If you didn’t have to work, would you?

– Write, travel, open my own business, discover life.

What are you doing to make less of an impact on the earth?

– Who wants to make less? Don't you want to make MORE impact?? (I get it. I recycle.)

Hope you all enjoyed and I look forward to your 20 answers ;)

Drowning...almost

I bought a home and survived the one year anniversary of my dad's passing. Home free! Things will be getting better. Wrong! Frustrated. Uneasy. Weepy. I'm fighting all of these feelings while I feel like I am drowning in them. The harder I fight, the more I lose. I don't understand, until I let go.


Letting go feels so good. I feel free, safe, and happy. Why does it take so long for me to remember? Why do I fight for so long? Is the struggle really necessary? OK, what lessons will I learn from these couple of weeks. Patience? Growth? Will I be motivated to move on (career wise)?

Almost drowning...means surviving. That's what I'm doing! SURVIVING!!!

I did it!

I bought my first home...all by myself. Sitting here in my dining room I can hardly believe that I am here. The process of buying a home was overwhelming and exhausting! Luckily, I was surrounded by wonderful people from the man who showed me the home, to the loan officer, the bank tellers, even the builder...all treated me well and were very helpful. I know, from my friends, that's not always the case!

Back to real life today. Work. Clean out my old apartment, change the mail, and return the cable box. Yuck!!!

Time to walk the dog. Have a good day!